EXO Next Door (우리 옆집에 EXO가 산다) Episode 9 Recap

Previously: Chanyeol is jelly of Hawt Guy. The Fab Four think that Yeonhee likes Kai. Kai enters House EXO.

We begin with a shot of Tao, Xiumin, Lay, and Chen walking into a room and greeting the rest of EXO. YAY YAY YAY MORE XIUMIN AND FINALLY CHEN...! I guess EXO-M was separated from EXO-K for a long time...wait, did EXO-M still exist then? We get some nice shots of them greeting, smiling, hugging, and being all cutesy, with some nice EXO background music (Lucky). A few months ago, I wouldn't have known most of these guys from Adam. However, after hours of watching their MVs extensive research, I now know who's who. EXO Showtime was a blessing in helping me figure out who the heck was who, because their MVs are a really crappy way to learn their faces and names--especially Overdose--you can hardly even see their faces.

"Get off my foot, Chen. Holy crap, that hurts."

Apparently, EXO is there for a photoshoot, so they disperse to get their hair and makeup done. They grin at each other like they're on happy pills or sharing some massive joke. 

"I just love you so much, Kai. Much more than Chanyeol. Seriously."

There's a montage of Tao and Xiumin doing a photoshoot together and being all funny and silly and cutesy and I'm so happy that I finally get to see them ~ ~ <3 <3  
Kai and Suho look on and laugh at them.

"xiumin ur 26 pls stop"

"Wait till they see how they get photoshopped..."

"PHOTOSHOOTS ARE FUNNY, HA HA."

Kai and Suho do their photoshoot next. Chen, meanwhile, is handing out food to the crew, and being all smiley and sweet. I would accuse him of faking to look good, but he did something similar on EXO Showtime. Even though poor Kai has nasty hair again that makes him look like a 30 year old creepy uncle (though it's nowhere near as bad as it was in Call Me Baby--blegh), Suho looks quite good. ;)  Apparently, Chanyeol and D.O. share my sentiment, because they notice with relief that Suho looks good (though they actually mean that he looks well enough to start dancing again). 
Sehun: *longingly* Look at Kai tho! He's so masculine.
Chanyeol: Duh, you idiot. He's not a girl.  
Sehun: *thoroughly chewed out* Uh, yeah.

Lay: *plays guitar*
Baekhyun: *sings*
Fangirls: *scream and die*
Lay: Hey Baekhyun, you think Chanyeol seemed a little stressed about song writing lately?   (LAY IS TALKING OMO!)
Baekhyun: "Art is agony. You know that."   [lol]
Lay: *nods*
Yeah, I think Lay does know. After all, he was able to make Mr. Happy-About-Everything Chanyeol (Real Chanyeol) feel depressed.

Chen: *entering* I have coffee! Who wants some! (CHENNNN)
Chen: *gives coffee to Xiumin*
Xiumin: "Wow, Fairy Chen Mother!"   [LOLOL]
Baekhyun: What's a Fairy Chen Mother?
Lay: Chen takes care of us like a fairy godmother, so we call him that. (Awww.)
I wouldn't mind having a Fairy Chen Mother--provided he could do the same things as a fairy godmother. Sure, he'd be nice to look at, but I'd rather have someone with actual magic powers. 

"At least he tries; this coffee is seriously crap."

I'm finding Lay's part in this kind of surreal, because he almost never talks or does anything in EXO Showtime (or at least they cut out his parts). At least he seems to be pretty good at playing himself; he's not nearly as wooden as I thought he'd be. And I hear through the KissAsian grapevine that he's been in a few C-dramas and is pretty good.

Baekhyun: Guess what. We have a secret member. It's Incheon Gal.
Xiumin: Oh yeah, your house cleaner, right?
Tao: *looking very excited* Is she pretty? [LOL TAO]
Baekhyun: I dunno. But she cleans the house well. [??] wut, baekhyun?? u don't have an opinion on whether she's pretty or not? Maybe he *does* only have eyes for Taeyeon...
Tao: I hear she's good at killing cockroaches. [LOLOLOL] 
(On a mostly unrelated note, Tao's Korean accent seems to have improved
since EXO Showtime days. I'm happy for him. Also, the poor hair girl keeps trying to fix Baekhyun's hair, but he keeps turning and moving and wriggling.)
Tao: (to Chanyeol) I want to meet her. Call her and make her come here. 

Well well, someone's assertive. And interestingly enough, for all his girly-ness and sensitivity (seriously. he is such a little girl), Tao seems like he'd actually do that in real life.
Chanyeol: Why would I do that?
Baekhyun: u chicken man? "Does your heart race or something?" 

Why did they give Baekhyun hot pink lipstick again??

Chanyeol: *freaking* (he does a surprisingly good job, lol) Why would I be nervous?
Chen, Baekhyun, Xiumin, Tao, and Lay: Let us see. Let us see. Let us see.
Chanyeol: Okay, okay! Chill. *calls Yeonhee*

Yeonhee: *enters the photoshoot room and is almost instantly blinded by
the hotness of Tao, Xiumin, Chen, and Lay*
All of them: *greet her and compliment her appearance*
Chen: *is sadly a wooden actor*
Tao: *stares with empty eyes*
(seriously, Tao's lights are on, but no one is home)

The four of them leave, so Yeonhee is free to check out Chanyeol as he does his photoshoot. Kai comes up to her and circles around her like she's a UFO or an alien artifact that just fell out of the sky. He brings her just outside the room, where it's more quiet. As they sit down, Chanyeol (who can see them through the open door) agonizes about what they could POSSIBLY be doing (they're just talking, bro. It's not like Kai's gonna jump her bones right there in the hallway). Chanyeol starts messing up the photoshoot by squirming and looking away from the camera. His irises look like little chocolate balls (I'm craving chocolate, shoot me). 

"I'm going to kill you and wear your skin."

Kai breaks out the charm and asks Yeonhee why she's there. She explains she came to give a folder to Chanyeol (lol, way to cover your back, dude), who is becoming more agitated by the second. They're obviously discussing their plans to sew the EXO members (sans Kai) butt to mouth for the Korean version of Human Centipede. C'mon, it's a strategic move. Get EXO member(s) in a movie or show, and people are bound to watch it no matter the quality *cough* Scarlet Heart Ryeo *cough* 

Just look at them, conspiring.

Kai leaves to do the group photoshoot, but he tells her to stay where she is. D.O. greets her, is adorable, and takes the folder from her to give to Chanyeol. A staff member closes the doors, leaving her in the hallway alone. We get a nice shot of their group photo (was this an actual photoshoot?) and then the scene switches to House EXO, where Chanyeol moodily climbs into bed (fully clothed though, sorry) and wangsts about the fact that Yeonhee
likes Kai instead of him. Hey, instead of wangsting, he could go throw darts at one of those giant Kai posters. Just an idea.

"You are SO dead, Kai."

He dreams that he's a kid again, and his grandpa is berating him for losing "it...not once, but twice." What, his virginity? (I'm so sorry). Chanyeol explains that he broke it (the necklace, of course), but Grandpa is very cryptic, telling him only that it's "close by." Maybe it's a bad translation. So it's in the house? Didn't we already establish that in what, Episode 2?

Later, Chanyeol moodily makes coffee and watches Kai and Yeonhee wiping dishes. (Totally unrelated, but there's an awesome balloon animal statue on the shelf behind Chanyeol.)  

"How can I kill him and make it look like an accident?"

Kai: Don't be so polite.
Yeonhee: Okay. *smashes a plate over his head* (Unfortunately, she doesn't actually do this).
Kai: If you're too polite, we can't be friends.
Kai is even more charming than before, perhaps even a bit flirty. He's playing on Chanyeol's jealousy and insecurity, and enjoying every second of it. Chanyeol wonders "Did he learn the art of seduction?" [lol] I doubt very highly that Kai needs to be seductive in the slightest; I'm sure every EXO member has an army of fangirls that would do anything for them, no seduction required.

Kai decides to screw with Chanyeol even more. He takes Yeonhee to the fridge (she muses about how good he looks, even in front of the fridge) [?], pulls out some hand cream, and gives it to her. Chanyeol, meanwhile, is acting like they're going to do it inside the fridge if he doesn't intervene. Kai explains that she'll need the hand cream, because the Fab Four keep her busy doing housework. As he says this, he throws several glances over his shoulder at Chanyeol, who is smoldering with rage. And there the episode ends.

ZEDD Cross Gene Movie Recap Part 1

So since the semester is finally over, I thought I'd go to bed early and sleep in since I can now. But the last few nights I've stayed up past 11 looking at k-pop memes and ugly pictures of Chanyeol (there are surprisingly quite a few ugly pictures of him, the members of GOT-7, and Taehyung from BTS, and almost none of Jin (BTS), N (VIXX), and Luhan). What am I doing with my life? 
*cue existential crisis*
And since I got about 5 hours of sleep last night (though not for lack of trying) excuse me if I seem less understandable than usual. I'm utterly exhausted. My right arm is hurting for no reason, and no amount of shoulder-popping or neck rubbing is helping.
*cue k-drama girl wailing, flailing, and hair-ruffling* 

Aaaanyway, today I'm going to start recapping a K-movie. This movie is not like your typical K-movie; it has zombies, stars a k-pop group (not EXO, but that would be So. Awesome), and is amazingly wonderful in that cheesy "oh-my-gosh-i-can't-believe-this actually-exists" way. Basically, the world has become overrun by zombies, and Cross Gene is trying to survive while continuing to do their singing and dancing. It's not a musical though--THANK GOODNESS.

The movie begins with Shin and Seyoung inside a black pickup outside some warehouses. Shin is in the driver's seat, Seyoung in the passenger seat. So Shin is the official driver of Cross Gene? He drove in one of their MVs...
Oh, and my sisters and I joke that Jin from BTS is a horrible driver, (even though he's the only one driving in their MVs) because he crashed into those boxes in No More Dream...but it's hard to drive a school bus, isn't it? They (Shin and Seyoung, not BTS) are wearing orange prison jumpsuits. Ooh, have Cross Gene been bad? Some chick on the radio is talking in English. "This is an emergency broadcast. Please take shelter inside a building." Oookay, wanna tell us what the emergency's about?? Seyoung flips the radio through a few channels, and the message is repeated in Chinese, Japanese, and Korean.

Shin (who is blonde, whyyy) whines that the radio makes him "sick" and Seyoung should turn it off. Seyoung argues that there might be something else on the radio. (like a gardening show or a stupid podcast about Lord of the Rings made by stupid people in giant hipster glasses that think they're  *so nerdy*??) (LOL, but that would be funny; Cross Gene listening to an English radio show about gardening and trying to figure out what the show was about--would Casper know?) Shin disagrees, dramatically hitting the steering wheel, and whine-exposits that it's been "212 days since Z-Day."

We get an outside shot of the car. I swear, my brothers had toy car that looked exactly like that. As is required in most zombie films, it's overcast and everything has a bluish tint (like everything in the Matrix had a greenish tint). Inside one of the dark(ish) warehouse-type buildings, there's a lot of stuff hanging down (you know, sheets of plastic and stuff that lets you see the silhouette of a person, like in horror movies), and various other debris you find in abandoned warehouses.

Casper, Youngseok, Takyua, and Sangmin are holding flashlights and rifles and dramatically tiptoeing around. They look exactly like 15-year-old airsoft players trying to look like Navy SEALs. They are wearing prison jumpsuits as well. Youngseok is wearing a Western hat, and is pulling it off veeery well. Okay, so did Cross Gene go to prison? [lolol] I mean, the choreography in some of their MVs could be classified as violations of the Geneva Convention *cough* Amazing Bad Lady and Billion Dolla *cough*, and coloring Shin's 
hair blonde is a criminal offense, but still...

Using a walkie-talkie stuffed in a pocket near the shoulder of his jumpsuit, Shin asks the building group what their "status" is. Yeah, why *are* they in the building? I hope it's for something important, like food or medical supplies or something. When he doesn't hear anything after 1.5 seconds, he screams "What's going on?!". Chill, dude. With that group's reaction time, you should allow them at least 5 seconds. Casper replies into a similarly placed walkie-talkie that he can't talk right now. Shin tells them to hurry, and does his crazy eyes and grin from Play With Me (Nahago Nolja). I think Shin just did that because he
wanted to play with the walkie-talkie.

THESE eyes. And now they will haunt my non-existent dreams.

The foursome continues on through the building. Casper and Sangmin have the top half of their jumpsuits wrapped around their waists (to show off their sculpted arms, obvi). Casper has a black tank top, and Sangmin has a white one. I'm sure this is very significant.They near a corner, where there is a long fluorescent (one of those words I still can't spell right as a college student) light swinging by its cord. Casper jumps out like an idiot. Fortunately, there's only a zombie there, and not anything dangerous like the God of Destruction, Leo (VIXX), or Satansoo (the dark side of EXO's cutie Kyungsoo). 

Casper jumps back and consults with his buddies on whether or not they should kill the zombie. I should point out that each of them speaks their native language (Casper Chinese, Takuya Japanese, and the other four Korean), and all of them are able to understand each other. Later on there's some English speaking characters. I guess that whatever zombified most of the world turned the remaining people into omnilinguals. Sweeet, man. Or maybe they have Babel Fish in their ears or something.

The swinging light looks a lot like a lightsaber (shameless EXO plug) (frickin' weird song, though--Korean guys trashing a convenience store and laying in giant sinks with their faces airbrushed within an inch of their lives doesn't exactly scream "Star Wars") Speaking of hot, Sangmin looks fiiine here. Weird. I've never found him that attractive. 

They discuss how many they've killed--hundreds--and Sangmin is like "LOL, I killed a bunch already; I'll get him!". The others yell at Sangmin to stop, but he steps out and happily blasts it away. Takuya's like "You dip, I said the sound would wake them up!"

Yeah, it was incredibly stupid to shoot the thing. It obviously wasn't a big threat--they could have bashed its head in with a blunt object. But we have to have Story and Problems and Tense Situations, so the rest of the zombie nest wakes up. The foursome inside the building take up a cool stupid looking pose and start shooting. Youngseok has Western revolvers to go with his Western hat. Aww, cute! Outside, Shin and Seyoung hear the shots and Seyoung starts screaming into the walkie talkie. (Interestingly enough, Seyoung looks a LOT like Lay here.)

Hearing no response, Seyoung gets into the bed of the truck and prepares to shoot any zombies coming out of the building. The foursome comes running out, the zombies following. The speed of the zombies is in between Night of the Living Dead zombies (soooo slow) and 28 Days Later zombies (really freaking fast). So, a fast walk. Seyoung yells at someone (Sangmin?) to not waste ammo. Good idea, dude. Really. Sangmin runs up and shows a box to Seyoung [?], all happy and grinning like he's a dog who just fetched poop instead of the stick you threw. The four jump on the truck and they zoom away. A bunch more zombies come out of the building to wave their arms and groan.

The title, "Zedd", comes onscreen. I'm not quite sure why the title is what it is; whether it's an acronym or a nonsense word or what. Anyway, we follow the car through the desolate streets of a city as the beginning credits (which are in English) roll. The music is actually pretty nice; your average tense, slightly epic, apocalypse videogame-type music. (I am so horrible at describing things...) The car is driving through a downtown area, and all the signs I can see are in English. So did they film this in the US or something? Everything looks really American--even the zombies looked white [LOL]. Going by the names in the credits, a lot of the people that worked on this movie were white and English-speaking, or Japanese. Interesting.

After the credits, we cut to a badly-lit abandoned bar where Cross Gene has set up shop. Interestingly, they don't call each other by their real names or their stage names; instead they call each other numbers. I don't think why they do this is ever explained. Seyoung cleans off a table and spreads a map on it, looking all studious and whatnot. Goofily grinning, Sangmin holds up a bottle of alcohol and says "Can I drink this?" It's funny to think that he's well over the drinking age, even for the US.
(Crap, I have to stop giffing Sangmin.)

Takuya, being the mature, responsible person that he is, tells him not to. I'm not familiar with how they act in real life (sorry bbys, if I misrepresent you), so I'm not sure if they're playing themselves, Flanderized versions of themselves, or characters entirely different from them.

Youngseok asks if they can start "playing" (Nahago Nolja namedrop??) and Seyoung says "not now." Sadly, Youngseok looks at a game box, which is actually the box that Sangmin showed Seyoung after they ran out of the building. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT THE HECK?? They went into that building and risked their lives for a BOARD GAME?? whaaaat?? This better be a really important board game, that's all I can say. 

"If I had to live my life without you near me/The days would be so empty/The nights would seem so long"

Shin and Takuya (why is that so hard to spell??) discuss the progress of their newest song [?] (it's "coming together"), but Casper says they're wasting time. Seyoung agrees "[their] priority is to get to the sanctuary." [??] You know, what, screw it. I'm suspending my disbelief and I'm going to relax, because it's just a show. Kick me if I start complaining about how unrealistic this is again.

Shin is like, "Well...yeah, but "we can't forget what we do best together." Wellll, I just thought of about 10 really dirty things. It's Shin's fault, with the fanservice he does. And actually, Cross Gene has been making some really funny parodies lately. Shin further exposits that movies and music are the only things keeping normal people from turning into zombies, and that life is meaningless without them. Well...that's kind of cool. And original, at least. No stupid viruses for this movie! (I'm not being sarcastic) Meanwhile, Youngseok and Sangmin have opened the game and started playing with the pieces. Aww. Casper needs to chill and play with the rest of Cross Gene. Embrace his inner kid and whatnot. Okay, I GUESS you could make the argument that the game is important because without it they would turn into zombies...

Casper rationally points out that there's no one around to hear their song, which shuts Shin up. Casper and Takuya argue whether or not they should have a goal (to make their lives more meaningful) or just try to survive. I have to admit, it's cool to hear them argue in 3 languages. And Casper's accent is not nearly as irritating as the accents in the C-drama "Ode To Joy." Seyoung is like "Shut up, y'all. We need to discuss what we're going to do tomorrow." Huh, lemme guess. Are they going to make an intrepid endeavor into an abandoned Costco to find a Chutes and Ladders game? (Wait, Costco doesn't sell Chutes and Ladders games, do they?)

As the rest of Cross Gene heads towards Seyoung's table, Takuya stops Shin and gives him a belt. Shin is overjoyed, like a little kid (a little kid who's really overacting) on Christmas. Apparently, it's the "transforming belt from the second Cross Rider." [??] I googled that, and all the results I found were for a computer virus. Yeah. So I guess this "Cross Rider" is a fictional anime or something  that only exists in the Zedd universe. He puts it on and heads to Seyoung's table. 

Pointing to the map, Seyoung explains that they're close to where he thinks the sanctuary is--at the entrance to "Marina Macau". So...they're on the peninsula of Macau, the "Special Administrative Region" of China Macau? (Yeah, look at me, professors. I'm being rebellious and linking to WIKIPEDIA!!) I guess that's not *too* far off from my original guess of Hawaii. The movie was filmed in LA, apparently.

So, any guesses as to what's stopping them from getting to the sanctuary? An angry horde of zombies? An angry horde of paparazzi? A drooling herd of fangirls? No gas? No ammo? Nope, it's a riddle. 

(The love of my sister's life, Kim Taehyung)

Not saying anything. Not saying anything. It's just a show, and I'm relaxing. Here it is. See if you can figure it out before our intrepid detectives do.
"3/7 and 17/24 arrive each time. The gate to the sanctuary opens on the road where there is no road." I don't know how well that translates to/from Korean, Japanese, Chinese, and English, but the riddle seems all Greek to me. Anyway, major kudos to the writers and translators--it seems like it would be hard to make a movie in 4 languages and have it still make sense. Sangmin grins like a 12-year-old who just heard something dirty.

Holding his chin in his hand like an adorable little Korean Sherlock, Youngseok says that they should search for ideas "efficiently", not "blindly." The others "whoah" like he just said something extremely insightful, and Youngseok cutely shrugs it off. Seyoung chimes in, saying they need to save gas and bullets. He looks pointedly at Sangmin as he says the last bit. Casper and Youngseok point out that there might not be anything at Marina Macau,
because they haven't heard anything on the radio in a month. Seyoung replies that they have to try. 

Sangmin: Okay, done with the boring stuff. Let's play!
Seyoung (AKA Wet Blanket): Wait, we have to think of ideas.
Shin: *grins manaically*
Sangmin: "No one ever thinks of anything anyway." (story brainstorming sessions with my sister in a nutshell)
Shin: I agree!
The others run off and start gabbling over the game, leaving Seyoung all by his lonesome. He walks outside (with his gun of course, he's not an idiot) and sits down.

Youngseok, who noticed him leaving, follows him outside. Apparently, Youngseok has a vest, cowboy boots, and spurs to complete his ensemble. My sister said a while back that Korean guys should dress up in Western outfits (along with the myriad of other costumes they wear--seriously, WHY does TOP have one of those Buckingham palace guard hats in Bang Bang Bang?), because they would look really hot. Well, she was right.

Anyway, they discuss their priorities: Seyoung is for finding the sanctuary, whereas Youngseok is of the opinion that they "need proof [they] are alive." Youngseok says that he and "Thirteen" (Shin?) have been making dance moves for their new song, and does some of the choreography for Billion Dolla. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Cross Gene REALLY REALLY needs a new choreographer. Seyoung replies in a deadpan tone, "Is that necessary?" What, having choreography for the song or the actual moves themselves? 

Youngseok replies that they need a "cool" dance for their "future world tour", (PLS DO A WORLD TOUR CROSS GENE) then keeps doing the very un-cool dance. He tries to get Seyoung to join him, but Wet Blanket Seyoung goes back inside, leaving Youngseok to stare gloomily at the dead world by himself. The music in this scene is very nice; it's that ambient space-type music that makes you feel like you're floating in a massive void and puts you to sleep. 

EXO Next Door (우리 옆집에 EXO가 산다) Episode 8 Recap

Previously:
Chanyeol is jealous of Hawt Guy. Sehun and Gwangsu form a bond over drip coffee. D.O. and Yeonhee stare at each other. Baekhyun spends all night talking to Xiumin about the dirty deets of Yeonhee, Chanyeol, and D.O.'s love triangle. Xiumin is bae.

This episode begins right back with Yeonhee and D.O. practicing lines. Yeonhee reads them like a robot, while D.O. puts great feeling into the words and stares at her intensely. D.O. apparently has a pretty good imagination ( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o) because he's able to envision them onstage together, saying all the lines and being very dramatic. (Or maybe it's Yeonhee imagining it? I don't know.) Anyway, Yeonhee blushes and ruins the moment. She leaps up, saying she feels bad and has to leave. Amused, D.O. smiles cutely as he watches her run out of the room. Baekhyun wonders if she "got a little too into character" and he and D.O. share a knowing smirk.

In the livingroom, Yeonhee freaks that Baekhyun and D.O. saw her blush and know that she got too into character. C'mon, it's not like you jumped his bones or anything. Her phone rings, and she rushes to get it, thinking it's Hawt Guy. However, Chanyeol has beat her too it, and holds the phone out of her reach. Yeonhee tries to wrestle it down and out of his hands (OMO SHE GOT TO TOUCH CHANYEOL), but her efforts are all in vain. Chanyeol wonders if Hawt Guy is really Yeonhee's "first love" and stares at her oh-so-intently again. OH MY GOSH I KNOW WHY CHANYEOL IS JEALOUS OF HIM. It's because Chanyeol considers himself to be Yeonhee's first love, isn't it? Ugh, I'm not crazy in love with Real Chanyeol (Xiumin, Suho and Chen are bae) but I'm slightly jealous.

This is totally what I'm gonna think of if I ever read Fifty Shades of Grey again.

A short montage follows in which Chanyeol and D.O. pine after Yeonhee and wonder about her love life. It's overlaid by sappy guitar music. 

i cri

everytiem

We next cut to Yeonhee laying on the couch (in her house), stuffing her face, and watching another EXO reality show. Show Chanyeol grins and Yeonhee wonders what happened to him in the last year to make him stop smiling like that. Well, Luhan and Kris leaving might have affected him a little.

Chanyeol sends her an angry text telling her to get to work, NOW!. I guess Baekhyun clogged up the toilet. Cut to her cleaning up House EXO, with Chanyeol yelling at her to get and do various things for him, throwing in a "Hurry up!" once in a while. Afterwards, Yeonhee complains to Gaeun (yet again) in her bedroom. Gaeun is more interested to know if Hawt Guy called. Yeonhee says no, but Gaeun is not disappointed: she tells Yeonhee to play hard to get and believe that every guy in the world wants her.

Gauen pulls an EXO poster off the wall and dramatically says "Every single EXO member in this poster loves you." As an aside, that sounds pretty nice...oh no, the fanservice is getting to me. I feel like I'm cheating on VIXX...

Naturally, Yeonhee turns into a blushing mess. Gaeun is like "I feel ya girl. It's natural to blush about something like this. But pretend like it's nothing. Even though all these amazing hot guys are totally in love with you and want to date you." Yeonhee turns into even more of a blushing mess. Gwangsu pokes his head in as Yeonhee stares at the EXO poster and mutters something about love.

Later in The Tent, he tells Sehun that "Incheon Gal" (why did the translators Romanize it as "Incheon Gal" instead of "Incheon Ttal"??) is in love with one of them. Sehun wonders who it is. 
"Handsome D.O.?" (a shot of D.O. wearing a ton of eyeliner and looking super hot) 
"Charismatic Chanyeol?" (a shot of Chanyeol wearing a ton of eyeliner and looking super hot) 
"Baekhyun is popular with the ladies..." U DON'T SAY. (Seriously, though, when he was doing the "shabby" show with D.O. ...oh my word.) (a shot of Baekhyun wearing a ton of eyeliner and looking super hot) 
"Could it be...?" (a shot of Sehun wearing a ton of eyeliner and looking super hot)
Gwangsu: *gives him a look that says "bitch, please"*
Sehun: *laughs awkwardly* It's probably not me.
D'awww don't worry bby. You have a ton of fangirls out there, some of who would probably fight to the death over you.

Cult leader...

Uh, angel from an 80s acid dream...

Old lady?

Gwangsu: It's TOTALLY not you!
Sehun: You' don't have to say it like that...
Gwangsu: My sister has the worst taste in men! She'd never fall for a perfect guy like you!   (Awww!) (❁´◡`❁)
Sehun: *smirks* You're very perceptive. [lol]

Cut to Livingroom EXO, where Sehun has just spilled the juicy news to the rest of the Fab Four. 
Sehun: She's madly in love...
Chanyeol: Whoa, THAT'S a surprise.
Baekhyun: Dude, you're reading that upside down.
Chanyeol: *clears his throat and quickly adjusts the book*
Baekhyun: Who is it? C'mon, tell us.
Sehun: The member she really likes is...*pauses for effect*...not here.
Sehun: It's Kai!

...wut? I mean, Kai has his good points (like when he and Sehun partnered up to get Chanyeol a birthday present) but...that's kind of out of the blue.
Sehun: Cool, huh?
Baekhyun, along with the audience: I didn't see that coming...

Someone (who knows the code to the house) enters. Huh, I wonder who it could be...
It's Kai! Speak of the devil. And HOLY CRAP, he has an awful haircut.
Kai: Yo, what up, dudes? Miss me? 
(I can guarantee Chanyeol missed you.)

On a mostly related note, I'm halfway done with recapping this show!

EXO Next Door (우리 옆집에 EXO가 산다) Episode 7 Recap

Previously: Yeonhee is formally accepted as a member of House EXO's staff and Gwangsu was horribly misled by the Mama MV. 

This episode begins right where the other left off: the Fab Four are ready to beat Hawt Guy up. Chanyeol's like "DID U MAKE HER CRY BRO??"
Hawt Guy folds like a wet paper towel and stammers that he totally didn't.
Yeonhee stammer-confirms this; she was just so happy to see him she cried. Yeah. Right.
D.O.'s like "If you're done get outta here," and Hawt Guy says he'll call Yeonhee and runs off.

The next scene features Yeonhee in her pajamas on her bed dramatically recounting the incident to Gaeun over the phone. In House EXO, as the Fab Four play foosball, Sehun and Baekhyun wonder what sort of relationship Yeonhee and Hawt Guy have. Sehun wonders if Hawt Guy is stealing Yeonhee's money [LOLOLOL], but eventually decides they're too old for that [?]. As he says this, he stops playing entirely and folds his arms. Guess he really doesn't care about the score. Through the use of mad detective skillz (HG called Yeonhee buy her name, she cried with happiness over seeing him), Baekhyun eventually decides that Hawt Guy is her ex. Chanyeol gets angry and takes it out on the foosball table. 

Meanwhile, Gaeun is surprised to find out that Yeonhee met  "first love" that day. She
explains to Yeonhee that since she (Yeonhee) has EXO, international superstars, on her side, she will be more desirable to Hawt Guy (whose name is Cho Minhwan, btw). He will "want to mark his territory." [lol, like a dog?] She says that Minhwan will call Yeonhee within three days. She "bet[s] her pinky on it." So Yeonhee can cut it off if he doesn't. Cool. I like this new mob vibe.

Sehun and Gwangsu have a tryst in the tent. Apparently, Gwangsu lied about his age--he's actually a freshman in highschool, and Yeonhee revealed this to Sehun in the interview. Sehun was 21 when this show was made, so more than old enough to boss Gwangsu around. Sehun calls Gwangsu out on his BS, but Gwangsu sniffs that Sehun was a bit dishonest too; he "hid...[his] supernatural powers."

Gwangsu wonders why Sehun still wants to be friends with him. Dramatically taking Gwangsu's hands, Sehun explains that he "can't forget" the drip coffee. Gwangsu says he'll make Sehun coffee anytime he wants it, as long as Sehun doesn't use his powers on him. Sehun thinks to himself that he's "addicted" to Gwangsu's "endless wackiness." So, not the coffee then? Gwangsu refuses to shake Sehun's hand (cuz that's how guys make up, don't you know?), but does an E.T finger touch with him. Oh, right, because he thinks Sehun is an alien.



Meanwhile, Yeonhee is fixing the blankets on Chanyeol's bed while he watches her intently. [snerk] Aaaand my mind just went straight to the gutter. However, as this is a K-drama, there are no R-rated scenarios to be had; rather, Chanyeol insults her cleaning skillz. Of course, it's not because he hates her, oh no, it's because he's jelly of Hawt Guy.

In D.O.'s room (you can tell it's his by the giant dorky picture of him) he's practicing lines with Baekhyun. Like any good teenage boy 23-year-old man, Baekhyun doesn't want to read the girl part, so he makes Yeonhee (who has conveniently just entered) do it. Oooh, I see where this is going. ;) Baekhyun gets on the bed to watch. All he needs now is some popcorn. Smirking, he says, "I'd rather watch than participate," and throws up a peace sign. And my mind went to the gutter again. 

Yeonhee starts reading the script, which reads something like: "Guy comes over to girl, hugs her, and kisses basically every part of her face." Yeonhee starts reading the lines, and I kid you not, she sounds exactly how I do when I'm trying to read a long sentence in Korean out loud and I only know half the words--so basically like a robot. D.O., of course, reads his lines beautifully and romantically. However, I have to wonder--was this an actual part that D.O. had? I know he's been in a few shows, but it really doesn't seem like SM would let him do all that kissing--kissing in regular dramas almost never happens anyway. Disgusted with her lackluster acting, Baekhyun begins playing the part of director, ordering both of them around. As D.O. begins to repeat the saccharine romantic lines once again, Yeonhee forgets that he's reading from a script and they both stare intensely at each other. 

The episode doesn't end here, however; after a few still images from the episode, during which Baekhyun sings a song, we cut to Baekhyun in Livingroom EXO, dying to tell the other members about something. He decides that Xiumin will be the first to hear the glorious news (YAY XIUMIN WHERE HAVE U BEEN). Baekhyun explains to Xiumin (who is laying on a couch in a dark room) that both D.O. and Chanyeol seem to be longing after Yeonhee. Xiumin is confused and curious; based on Chanyeol's behavior, he thought that Chanyeol just wanted to make "her life miserable." Baekhyun agrees, then drops THE BOMB: He has "definite proof" that Chanyeol likes Yeonhee. Lemme guess, he didn't flay her alive when she arranged his shoes in the wrong order? 

Xiumin suddenly sits up, and WHOA, seeing him so animated is really odd. From the little I've seen of him on EXO Showtime, he seems extremely reserved, so this is like seeing Leo (VIXX) laughing really loud (Beautiful Liar filming) or screaming at a bug (Fantasy filming). Anyway, Xiumin is like, "Oh, FFS, you mean they're in a love triangle??" [lololol] 

Thank goodness the writers were willing to be a little meta. Baekhyun asks Xiumin if he can talk all night (aww, they want to gossip. How cute.) Xiumin is like "Heck yeah!" and so they spend the night over the phone, discussing the love triangle down to the last detail. THEN the episode ends. (For some reason, Baekhyun and Xiumin's phone call isn't on KissAsian; it is on Facebook, though.)